If we want to be recognised for who we are, it’s inevitable to be true first – to ourselves.
years ago I found myself trapped in a house of cards… the walls were made of lies – one of them being a super achiever, without needing a break, disrespecting my femininity by ignoring periodical swings, entering relationships with unqualified men. I knew well that moving one card will make my entire construction of truth-variations collapse and I’d have no shelter anymore. and so I decided to do it, curious about the fabulous feeling it will give me afterwards. on the other side of the fence all seemed glitter and shine.
I stepped into the unknown. in the Balkans, where i come from we’d say: carrying on the tongue what I carry in my heart. At times uncomfortable, sometimes disturbing and really difficult. Occasionally I catch myself inventing another lie to myself, and quickly move back to the quest…. what am I doing? and why? is it aligned with my truth?
not speaking my truth has certainly influenced my sexuality. bonds with unhealthy men, wrong intentions and impure decisions. how should I be recognized for who I am, if I don’t honour it myself?
to walk this path I have my own 4 ½ methods to release stagnant energies, whenever I notice them.
I like write articles, blogs or even things in my secret booklet, I know nobody will ever read. when my thoughts are written down, they seem so touchable and I am pleased to discover the flow in them. insights pouring from my heart through my arm directly into my fingers…
at times I tell myself stories with my little phone recorder. listening in what the voice tells me. does it sound real?… and again… once in the flow, I simply can’t stop and surprise myself over and over again. at times it feels like an unstoppable river flowing…
3. Yoni Egg
for about a year I have been wearing my Yoni Egg. when not wearing it in my Yoni, it used to be close to me when meditating. what embarks in my Yoni starts moving up my spine and finds its way to be released. I am fascinated by my womb’s power to truth.
music could replace oxygen for me. I start singing during work or when on the move. at times, when I can’t do it aloud, I chant some tones up and down or simply hum. It releases all what is stuck in the throat. the sound invites more vibration and when I focus on it, the vibration moves through my whole body.
when I take it to the next level… and there is no right or wrong, no can dance or can’t… I let my hair down and start dancing…I don’t feel the vibration, my body is the vibration. liberating the layers of lies which are holding me back, I awake to a new powerful version of mine each time.
being true to myself, doesn’t give me always friends.
it’s even challenging at times.
but ultimately, when I dance in front of the mirror after waking up, I want to look into my eyes and see the real version of me.
looking into nothing else than my Violeta-essence.
what do you practice to hear to your true voice?